Sunday, December 13, 2009

1213.

Today, I had nothing to say, and I still don't.

Saturday, December 12, 2009

1212.

Today, I wondered what you would think if you knew anything about my everything.

Friday, December 11, 2009

1211.

Today, I heard your words but your shirt said otherwise.

Thursday, December 10, 2009

1210.

Today, I wanted you and I wanted out.

Sunday, December 6, 2009

1206.

Today, I neglected your needs and didn't feel as bad as I thought I would.

Saturday, December 5, 2009

1205.

Today, I wondered what you were thinking about and I realized it probably shouldn't matter to me.

Friday, December 4, 2009

1204.

Today, I looked at you and wondered if I should stop but there's no else around, is there?

Thursday, December 3, 2009

1203.

Today, I finally realized the truth about you and it positively blew me away and I don't think I'll be lusting anymore.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

1202.

Today, there may have been a lie among us but you never speak anymore so how could I know?

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

1201.

Today, I heard your voice when it wasn't there and missed you when you were still right next to me.

Monday, November 30, 2009

1130.

Today, you were next to me for the first time in a long time like everything was alright although it really wasn't.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

1129.

Today, you actually showed up on the most important day and I was glad and you were positively amazing and I almost got up the courage in that light by that water with those eyes.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

1128.

Today, you noticed something of mine and commented on it when I thought you only looked at her.

Friday, November 27, 2009

1127.

Today, I wrote 1,111 words and you were hinted at beneath each and every one.

Thursday, November 26, 2009

1126.

Today, I thought about what I'm thankful for and even though I wanted to say it was you, I realized that I'm not thankful for you yourself but for what you do to me.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

1125.

Today, you sang to me and we practiced our geographic trivia and built a fort and watched couples cuddle and appreciated innovative birthday gifts and it felt like gold every time you touched me.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

1124.

Today, I thought it was going well until you blew up over the one thing I thought had no effect on you. Don't always trust the results of those surveys, kids.

Monday, November 23, 2009

1123.

Today, I taught you something you never knew and I saw the wonder in your eyes and the gratitude in your smile and the purpose in this life.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

1122.

Today, you managed to creep into my thoughts yet again and I realized that you have feelings too and I tried to imagine how sad you must be when people leave.

Saturday, November 21, 2009

1121.

Today, you were within walking distance of me yet you didn't come to my door, but you still checked up on me later instead of her and I wish I was really more important to you than she is even if I'm not.

Friday, November 20, 2009

1120.

Today, you held the bag for me as I picked for our rendition of a Secret Santa which ultimately failed because you got yourself and maybe it's just because that's the way fate is or maybe it's because fate knows that only I would put love into your gift while everyone else would only put thought.

Thursday, November 19, 2009

1119.

Today, our legs were touching and your two fingers fell softly on my knee and I felt those birds flitting about again but then I saw how you were even closer to her and then we felt as different as dental floss and a geometric compass.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

1118.

Today, when your back was to me, I thought about all the times I'd played with the back of your hair and let my fingers trace your spinal cord although it gave you the chills, and I wished I was still able to do it all.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

1117.

Today, I noticed the date and I was the only one who wanted to wait for you yet I was guilty by association when we all left and the hurt in your face and the pain in your voice made me regret everything I've ever done.

Monday, November 16, 2009

1116.

Today, when we were arguing about something useless yet again, I stopped and looked into your eyes and wondered why anyone would want to hurt you.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

1115.

Today, I thought about the first time we met and the way you played with your pen like it would take you away and I wondered if you ever felt like that when we were one.

Saturday, November 14, 2009

1114.

Today, I read the last sentence of the annual something and it made me happy and it made me sad and all I wanted was everything.

Friday, November 13, 2009

1113.

Today, you were where you always stood last year and I pointed upwards and put my hand over my heart and no one else understood but you got it right away and later you put the same three fingers on the inside of my elbow and you didn't leave a waterfall behind, but a fire.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

1112.

Today, you caught my eye from across the room and I caught yours and we had the tiniest moment and you smiled in an ashamed way and it surprised me how you thought I would never feel that electricity surging through my mind and body again.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

1111.

Today, I realized that even when the world has a day off, it doesn't mean I have a day off from wishing for you.

Monday, November 9, 2009

1109.

Today, we were surrounded by bad novels and torn-up classics and outdated encyclopedias and you were smiling and the camera flashed while not even directed at you and I left but in retrospect I should have stayed.

Sunday, November 8, 2009

1108.

Today, your name flashed before my eyes and its image was burned into the back of my head and I could see it upside-down and backwards and scrambled and black and white and then it was gone and you were gone.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

1107.

Today, as we were taking turns playing on an old out-of-tune piano with only 66 keys, you scooched over on the bench and you taught me how to play the bass line to a song you love and you played the melody and we pretended to be your favorite musician, standing up with one leg behind us and it felt like last year again, except with nicer clothes and a different status.

Friday, November 6, 2009

1106.

----
Do you remember when you gave me this golden-laced speech? Do you remember how you felt that night? Do you remember the tears you caused to spill over my mascara-unladen eyelids? Do you remember how you made me think I had another chance with you?
Do you remember how you thought you could never hate me?
Times have changed, I see.
----

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

1104.

I'm describing why I want to never forget you.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

1103.

Because I wasn't in love anymore.

Monday, November 2, 2009

1102.

Then why'd you break it?

Sunday, November 1, 2009

1101.

And avoiding Sequoia.

Saturday, October 31, 2009

Thursday, October 29, 2009

1029.

And different opinions of Andy.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

1028.

And different ways of walking to tech.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

1027.

And walking around the school the long way.

Monday, October 26, 2009

1026.

And distracting you and the clarinets.

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Friday, October 23, 2009

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

1021.

Why do I need to forget about all that?

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Monday, October 19, 2009

1019.

And winter percussion.

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Friday, October 16, 2009